When you’re chilling by yourself, being busy, doing house stuff, do you talk to yourself? I grew up with a set of parents who ALWAYS talked to themselves. I remember I’d sneak up on them when they’d be doing whatever it was they were doing; gardening, cleaning out the garage, looking through drawers, and they’d just be full-on having a conversation with themselves. I remember I’d jump out and go “ahhhhh!” and of course I’d always scare them, especially my mom. She’s usually curse in Spanish and tell me to go away. I thought they were the weirdest, but then I got older…
A few days ago, when I was doing what I always do, which is make these ice cream sandwiches at home for my internet friends (that’s you, by the way) I caught myself having a conversation with.myself. Like, I was talking for the other person too. I was using my voice for my side of the convo and then responding as if there was another person there. And I’m pretty positive this wasn’t the first time, it was just the first time I’d caught myself. I felt like I was a cross between Amanda Bynes and my parents.
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I’m pretty sure I’m the only woman on the planet who avoids Target. Or as I like to say, “tar-zhay.” So fancy.
It stresses me out, man. Too many screaming kids, too many options, too much of everything. I mean, when I’m there, I love it. Their beauty goods? Their sock selection? Holy moly, perfection. But I usually just avoid that place because I get distracted, become a little overzealous and then end up feeling vulnerable, which usually leads to me spending way too much money. Also, the parking situation is usually a nightmare. Tar-zhay stress!
This is why I usually head to my neighborhood Rite-Aid/CVS. I live in what people call a “gentrified” area. I sort of hate that word but it makes it so my Rite-Aid adventures are a little on the crazzzie side, in a good and scary sort of way. The biggest perk about going? The Thrifty’s ice cream. That ice cream case, always attendant-less, always calls my name as I pass by.
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Sometimes I want to love what everyone else loves…but don’t. Like, harem pants (my thighs don’t need help looking larger – thanks) or frappuchinos (real coffee, please) or sparkly shoe clips or Mad Men (boring). Peanut butter and chocolate is one of those things that the entire world LOVES. And I do, too.
It’s the classic of classic combos. And there’s good reason. Something magical occurs when chocolate and peanut butter come together. The clouds open, the symphony sounds, a Lisa Frank rainbow appears in the sky and smiles appear.
This cookie has chocolate, peanut butter, oatmeal and a good amount of salt all mixed into one.
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My brain doesn’t always match the season. I think of the best Halloween costumes in March. (I mean, can you imagine Amelia dressed as a stick of butter? Or dressed as Jasmine from Aladdin?)
I come up with most original and special Christmas gift ideas in July. All of my best Fall recipe ideas come to me when I’m sweating in August. And I thought of this gem of a recipe a few days before Christmas when I was wrapping presents.
I was craving strawberries which lead my brain to thinking about strawberry milkshakes. I wondered why I hadn’t thought to make strawberry milk and put it in my favorite cookies. So here we are…four months later, at the beginning of strawberry season, Spring-ifying and cute-ifying the deli cookie classic, the black and white cookie.
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I so often dislike things that are similar or practically identical to things that I love. A few examples, my friends:
I dislike lipstick but love lip stain. (This one has grown on me.)
I dislike filing my nails (it feels weird) but love painting my nails. (I’m wearing this color right now.)
I dislike red roses but love spray roses. (Evidence that I’m a girl.)
I dislike raisins. Like, loathe raisins (golden raisins are excluded). But I just LOVE currants.
They’re the same but different. Black currants are cuter, tastier, sweeter, and teeny-tiny compared to big ol’ raisins.
Out of all the cookie genres—fat and tall, crispy and thin, round and meaty—chewy is my total favorite.
Chewy is cool! Chewy is chic! Chewy is the new black!
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You guys…I’m an adult now. I’ve been an official adult for some time now, but yesterday, as I was driving down the street, it dawned on me that the past few months have been revelatory. I’ve changed. I’ve grown up. The evidence is evident. And here it is:
1. I have a Christmas tree in my living room. Every year, pre this one, I’ve felt no need to get a Christmas tree because I’d usually just enjoy my family’s tree. But this year…I bought one for myself, to enjoy by myself. Whoa.
2. I picked a color palette for Christmas. I’m using the same color for my tree, wreath and Christmas gift-wrapping. Yes, my friends…a Christmas color pallete. Who am I?! (It’s white, silver and wood-colored, in case you’re curious.)
3. As I was driving last night, I saw three very lovely (and probably very smart) girls walking down the street in heels so high and dresses so short and tight that I thought: A. I might see their privates any second. B. They might fall down and I might laugh, like, a lot. I shook my head. I wished their mothers could see them. And then I just felt old.
4. Yesterday I took the ice cube tray out of the freezer, used up all the ice and then did something I never do: I filled it up with water and returned it back to the freezer. Ahhh…adulthood!
But then I ate three slices of lemon tart for dinner while standing in my kitchen. And I was doing so well…
Cookies. Let’s talk about cookies that belong in your arsenal.
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This is the cookie version of a trust fall.
You know, those trust falls you supposedly did at summer camp with people you only knew for three days.
Why would I trust someone I barely know to catch me?! Whatever. Actually, I went to summer camp and never did trust falls. But movies tell me that’s what kids did during summer camp so I dunno…
I did, however, go to a tennis summer camp in the mountains of California and for some crazy reason we were allowed to drive jet skis by ourselves at age nine. Age nine!!!
Back to curry in cookies.
This cookie is cool and weird and spicy and sweet.
I get a lot of good inspiration and ideas from all of the ice cream I eat. A few months ago I had chocolate soft serve ice cream with coconut curried flakes (Instagram evidence: here) on top. The combination was unreal, interesting and when I thought about it, made total sense. Curry and coconut go together in a savory way so naturally. And chocolate is a no-brainer of a pairing with coconut, so putting them all together just works! I turned that weirdo ice cream combination into a delicious weirdo combination of a cookie.
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Today this post is all about saying sorry…to yourself.
Do you ever have those days when you’re just irritable? Of course you do. Yesterday, this happened. But instead of being irritated with others (like what would normally happen), I found myself all by myself with no one around, thus resulting in me just being irritated with myself.
I was annoyed that I almost backed my car into my landlord’s car. I was annoyed that I kept tripping over cords. I was annoyed that it was hot and yet I was determined to blow-dry my hair. And then I got annoyed with myself for sweating so much. I was annoyed with myself that I let my pile of laundry get sky-high. I was annoyed that I really wanted a hamburger but was too lazy to drive somewhere. And then I just got really annoyed for being annoyed. Like, shut up. Ew. Stop whining.
It was like I was 2 people but wasn’t. Like, one really annoying, bad mood person and one totally innocent person. The innocent person totally taking the brunt of my irritableness. Humans are complicated.
I finally forced myself to snap out of it. I decided to be super nice to myself. I painted my nails. I watched a movie. And then I gave myself some cookies. Being nice is way more fun.
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Wasn’t 4th of July kind of a weirdo this year? I mean, in the middle of the week? How awkward. No long weekend. No weekend getaways. I wonder if 4th of July feels a little weird about itself.
Or maybe it’s all sorts of proud that it gave people an awesome little mid-week break. Who knows! I spent the good part of the morning in my pjs putting brown butter and blueberries in cookies so, for me, it was kind of perfect.
I’ve now realized that brown butter very rarely doesn’t have a place in edible things. It never fails at making things better. Never. I think we should talk about these cookies. I love them…a lot.
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Whoa. I miss cable. Like, a lot. Remember a few weeks ago I was all brave cancelled my cable? Well, I miss it. Sure, I mean, I get my Mad Men fix and I watch Game of Thrones (totally illegally) ever week. But the real question–which I’m too ashamed to google to find out myself–is…how is Bethenny? What’s up with her and Jason? Are they okay? Also, Shahs of Sunset…is it awful in a good way or just straight up unbearable?
Last weekend I was at the bar and a friend made a Shahs of Sunset joke and it completely went over my head. Everyone laughed except me! I felt left out, guys. On the flip side, being sans cable has me reading books out of desperation, so that’s cool I guess, if you’re into that sort of thing.
I just finished Gabrielle Hamilton’s book, Blood, Bones and Butter, and whoa. Phew. If you’re looking for a new read, look no further–this is it. The writing is so beautiful, her journey so awesome and untraditional, and her whole perspective on food and cooking is really interesting. It’s lovely stuff.
Let’s talk about these fine looking cookies. They’re bright, spongy in texture (this is good!) and so refreshing. Have you ever had a refreshing cookie? Well…here ya go. The recipe, a random rant from moi, along with step-by-step photos are over on The Tasty Kitchen blog. GO!
And then come back here to tell me how Bethenny is doing. Okay?!
