Avocado

You know what you don’t need? A guacamole recipe. I dunno.

Maybe this is me being a total brat, but honestly, even if you don’t know how to boil water, the last thing you need is a recipe that involves mashing, folding and adding salt. That’s just silly talk.

I lamented for a long time about sharing this situation you see pictured because why do you need this?! You can do this without me. Who am I to tell you how to make your guacamole.

But, I love it. So I figured that maybe you would, too. And maybe you never thought to put pomegranate seeds in guacamole. And maybe you’ll make it and share it with someone. That’d make my day.

So here I am. Just a girl…with a bowl of guacamole, asking you all to mash up some ripe avocados, mix ‘em with some chopped up cucumbers and pomegranate seeds. It’s way more special this way! Refreshing, sweet, lime-y…special!

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The real name of this salad should read:

“Roasted Rainbow Heirloom Carrot Goat Cheese and Avocado Salad with a Citrus Cumin Dressing.”

But! it needed some tweaking. Let’s not do recipe titles that read like paragraphs. Not a good look. Also the word “rainbow” is way cuter than the word “heirloom.” (I think.) Who doesn’t want to eat a rainbow?! No one.

This dish is like a plate full of skittles…but in carrot form.

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Last Friday my stove decided to have a tantrum and stopped working. Kind of annoying…I had serious cooking plans for a picnic. Instead I just ate wine and half a cupcake. It worked out juuuust fine.

Cut to this week: still no stove…I kinda started hoping it needed to be replaced. How dreamy are those O’Keefe and Merritt stoves?! In pale blue?! Hello cuteness!

Sooo…I dug out my toaster oven and started putting stuff on toast. All sorts of stuff. Possibilities…endless.

And then, as soon as my stove was fixed, I made this poached egg and put it on a piece of bread with some salt, pepper and parmesan. Runny eggs are just swoon-worthy, aren’t they?!

Almond butter and sliced strawberries. Delicious. Sweet. Killer combo.

I’m not even gonna start by telling you that turkey bacon compares to regular bacon. It just doesn’t. It can’t. Impossible. It’s healthier, though, so there’s that.

BACON > TURKEY BACON/EVERYTHING…for life.

But I just bought a few bathing suits this week and have yet to try them on. Ugh.

So here you have it: turkey bacon, a few basil leaves, a swipe of veganaise and a few sliced tomatoes on toast.

P.S. I don’t try bathing suits on in stores anymore. The lighting is heartbreaking. So now I just buy a bunch on a credit card, try them on at my apt, and take the ones that don’t work back to the store. Total game changer. Have you tried this?

Avocado on Toast is an all time fav.  Adding some ricotta to the mix took it to a whole other level of amazingness.

In other news, this weekend I’m gonna celebrate my reunion with my kitchen by making something crazy…can we say doughnuts?! I dunno…they might be in mini form, they might be girly and pink, or they might have sprinkles in them, maybe even some amazing glaze on top. Who knows…the world is my doughnut…or whatever.

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Avocado Shake

in Drinks

I’ve been wanting to try this Avocado Shake for some time now, but honestly, the weirdness of eating avocado in a sweet context kept me away. But last weekend, I was totally guacamole-ed out (a first for me!) and needed to use a bunch of avocados stat.

Figured it was the perfect time for this shake to have its moment. And holy avocado! Not sure what I was waiting for, but this shake has seriously confirmed what I’ve always suspected: avocado is perfect.

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Since we’re friends and we have a bit of a relationship going, I feel like I should confess something.

If you’ve noticed I haven’t cooked anything in a while. It started with this Grapefruit Coconut Scrub; I then moved onto the giveaway…and now I give this Avocado and Grapefruit Salad

It’s because…are you ready? I’m on a diet-thingy.

This winter has been a long one.

I ate burgers, like, a few times a week, I had milkshakes, cupcakes and tuna melts. I do what I want!

I figured I needed to take a break, and get healthy or whatever. I bought a program from Tracy Anderson called Metamorphosis. And wouldn’t you know, I’ve dropped a few pounds, I work out now…and do this embarrassing dance cardio (in the privacy of my own home), and feel loads better. It’s miraculous what moving your body and not eating butter everyday can do.

The downside is that I haven’t been able to eat anything fun. though I have taken the liberty to cheat.  I deserve it, right? I’m an adult, I pay my taxes (oh. do. I. pay. my. taxes.) and my parking tickets!

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I have a particularly tragic memory of looking at rental houses with my friend when he first moved to LA and finding one that actually had an avocado tree in the backyard. I mean, a tree that was taller than the house and was heavy with ripe avocados This memory is tragic because my friend didn’t rent the house. If he had, I would have had a never ending supply to feed my avocado addiction.

BTW – what are avocados, a vegetable? Some weird fruit? Either way, I really, really, REALLY love these…veggie-fruits from heaven. Let’s count the ways, shall we?

1. Guacamole is possibly my favorite food.

2. I like avocado sandwiches. A lot.

3. I have been known to sprinkle some salt on a halved avocado and just eat it with a spoon. I’ve been known to do this without the salt.

4. Avocado on a burger? Yes, please.

5. Avocado fries on the side of my burger? Now you’re really talking.

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I understand that no one needs a recipe for nachos. I get it.  We’re all adults. Nachos are a no-brainer.

And I’ll happily admit that this really was just an excuse for me to make nachos.  It was game day and I thought I’d get in the mood with a little chips with cheese.

And then proceeded to watch Teen Mom instead of the game. Good idea.

Before we move on with nachos, can we all just agree that Teen Mom is the scariest show on television? Even more terrifying than Hoarders…

Back to nachos.

I have some nacho theories (um, don’t we all?).

I’m particular about nachos. And can sometimes get an attitude about the way nachos are assembled.

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Let’s talk snacks!

You know how all those diets say “eat four-five small meals a day.”  Umm…I can’t cook that often. I have a job. I like to see my friends. I don’t have a dishwasher. I have to curl my hair. These are all reasons why I can’t cook five times a day. Sorry, diets.

BUT I do love snacks, especially ones that take five minutes to put together.

WARNING: I have no idea if theses are “healthy,” but I do know they taste good, and are sorta healthy. Or at least I think so.

The first one is Avocado on Toast. Super easy and delicious.

All you’ll need is a half of an avocado, bread lightly toasted, a little crushed red pepper, salt and pepper, dash of olive oil and a squirt of lemon.  Done.  Delicious.

Second awesome snack of the day.  Perfectly boiled egg on a buttered whole wheat english muffin topped with a little salt and pepper. Easy! Fast! Cute!

This is my favorite. I love protein shakes, but I also love my morning coffee. This is hybrid of the two.

I present to you: Coffee Banana Protein Shake.

Some cooled coffee, scoop of whey protein powder, couple ice cubes, dash of vanilla extract and a half of a banana. That simple!

This isn’t a snack, but more of a way to force myself to drink more water. We all need to do this, right?

Just some filtered water with the latest winter citrus: sliced meyer lemon and a tangelo. And cucumber for some added freshness. It’s like the water you get at a spa.

What are you snacking on?

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Pulling a muscle in your back totally sucks. Especially when you do it on a Saturday morning. Even worse is when your fiancé is sick with a cold at the same time. Yeah, we had a super awesome weekend.

Thanks God for Law & Order SVU marathons.

And take out pho noodle soup.

And easy to make California avocado sandwiches.

I’m not gonna lie, I totally ripped this off from Atlanta Bread Company. And I really wouldn’t’ have had a problem buying one of theirs except there isn’t a single one in Los Angeles. Ironic, considering they’re the ones that named this the California Avocado sandwich. So they left me with no choice, I had to make it on my own.

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Since I enjoy cooking, I hardly ever Sandra Lee-it. Meaning, I steer clear of store bought ingredients like pie crusts, biscuits, cookie dough, etc. I always find it easier to just make them myself, cheaper even and definitely healthier.

But I have a confession: I totally Sandra Lee-ed it on this pizza. I’ve been working like crazy lately and I wanted to enjoy the day outside rather than being locked inside forced to wait for this pizza dough to take its sweet-ass time rising.

I also didn’t want to slave over the stove for my marinara sauce to come out just right, or spend time shucking ears of corn–so I used the frozen stuff.  Yes, at the peak of its season I opted for the frozen stuff in my freezer. It was a pretty day, okay?

So I took Sandra Lee’s route, but only my way. Instead of going to the grocery store to get pizza dough, which is usually loaded with preservatives, I went to a local pizza place that I love and bought pizza dough from them for $3. I didn’t even know you could do this until a few months ago.

Then I bought some good quality, jarred marinara sauce; bought my other ingredients and had my pizza done in twenty-seven minutes flat.

Yes, twenty…seven. (I timed it.)

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