Pretzels

Everything Soft Pretzels

Everything bagels are my everything; hence the reason why I figured it’d be a slam dunk of an idea to put that everything topping on soft pretzels. It’s like one of those duh-this-will-taste-good-moments. I’m not sure I can properly express my excitement for this recipe because if you can’t sense it then I’m doing a v v bad job articulating how freaking excited I am!

Some people are sesame bagel people. Some people are asiago bagel people. But then…there are everything bagel people and that is where I fit in. My home belongs in between the poppy seeds and the onion flakes and the sesame. It’s a glorious place to be that makes your mouth smell terribly and there’s a good chance you’ll have dark seeds stuck in your teeth but whatever! Basically, everything bagels aren’t first date material. But they’re good life material.

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Baked Pretzel Doughnuts | www.acozykitchen.com

Can we talk about Tinder for a second?

I’m currently trying to convince two of my very single friends to sign up for Tinder. I’ve heard nightmare stories, I have, but I also know at least two or three friends who have ended up finding legit relationships on there. Dating is hard. I hated dating. I actually hated dating Joshua…haha. So much wishy-washy BS, so many, like, should I do this or should I text that. Too much guessing, man. You’re either in or you’re out! But I suppose that’s also what can make it exciting and fun.

I’m actually quite fond of my current role, which is being the go-to person for dating advice amongst my friends…mainly because I’m nosey and love being all up in their business. I’ve attempted to be the match-maker, and while I love it, I’m not sure I’m that great at it. Though, there is this couple I set-up in high school and now they’re married, have two kids and a super cute dog, so I have had success!

Baked Pretzel Doughnuts | www.acozykitchen.com

Speaking about success…Pretzel Doughnuts, man. Hello! I teamed with Almond Breeze for this recipe and yes, it’s absolutely dairy-free. If you like, you can substitute the oil for melted butter—it’ll taste delicious. I steeped the Almond Breeze with pretzels for a few hours, in the fridge, until they were nice and soft. I blended the milk mixture, resulting in almond milk that tasted EXACTLY like pretzels…with a hint of almond-y flavor.

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There’s this game…not sure if you’ve heard of it…but it seriously is all consuming. Like, it swallows people for like 4 months out of the year. They join fantasy leagues. (We’ll get back to that in a second…) They scream at the television. Become depressed if their teams loses. Wear pieces of cheese on their heads. Stand in negative 30-degree temperatures…

It’s called football. You’re familiar with this, right?!

And fantasy leagues…really, boyz?! Really?! When I finally had the mental energy to pay attention to the explanation I got one of my dude friends, I was totally disappointed. I mean, statistics…off of how players play. UGH! Snoozefest, USA.

I do like boyz, though. And boyz like football so I guess by proxy I like football, too.

And I dig football food, obvi. Wings and celery and cheese sticks and nacho cheese and chips and snacks!! I can get down.

Enter…pretzel tots…

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